Thursday, June 4, 2009

I Have a New Mantra

My new mantra is...

Wait. Let me back up a bit. Monday night I was playing Bunco. For those of you who have no clue what that is, it's a stupid dice game that women in the suburbs play. This is as good a time as any to mention that I made more money in 2008 playing Bunco than I made in Hop! Plop! royalties. How sad is that?

Anyway, there are 12 women in the game and everyone hosts one month out of the year. We were sitting around stuffing our faces when we got started on the subject of "delivery stories." This led to medical "horror" stories in general. (You know, doctors forgetting an instrument inside you type of things) We're a competitive group. Jessica, wanting to top everyone, said, "Well, we had a regular customer who was a doctor. He had a diabetic patient once who needed a foot amputation. And he cut off the wrong foot." She won hands down.

So, from now on... when I forget the pom poms for my daughter's dance recital and I want to kill myself, I am simply going to breathe and say, "At least I didn't cut the wrong foot off!"

12 comments:

Tess said...

oh, no! that's terrible.

And, I played bunko once. It was a couples invitation and my husband had this horrible, pathetic look that read 'get me out of here now' on his face the whole evening. I,personally, had a great time.

Yat-Yee said...

I thought the cutting off the wrong leg was an urban myth! A good mantra.

Corey Schwartz said...

Well, Yat-Yee, I know they do now make you sign your own leg with a marker, so there must be SOME reason why they now institute this policy.

Joyce Wolfley said...

Ah. Eeh. Uck. That makes my ankle itch tremendously.

I haven't played bunko in years and years.

Lisa said...

Ok, so everything in my life looks a lot rosier if I think about losing and/or cutting off the wrong foot.

BUT I'm still antsy, crabby and generally in a bad mood. This might call for more serious reinforcents of the ice cream variety.

Kelly H-Y said...

Yikes! Yes ... that would be very bad!
Your comment about Bunco winnings versus book royalties cracked me up!

Rebecca said...

Cutting off the wrong foot. Yikes! At least I can't see myself screwing up THAT bad.

That story makes me wonder, though, if they could reattach that foot.

Solvang Sherrie said...

Whoa! How bizarre!

Some friends tried to get me to start playing Bunco. I joined a book club instead. I didn't realize I could have been making money!

Katie said...

I cracked up at your winning more money in Bunco than royalties... so sorry.

I used to play that game and I HATED it! I would convince my table to just pick a winner and then we would pretend roll and talk.

But the foot?! wow.

beth said...

Ohhhhh......ohhhh.....baaaaaaaad. I feel so sorry for that guy! (and almost as bad about the royalty thing!)

BJW said...

My wife's a nurse. So I'm pretty astute and knowing when to excuse myself from conversations around her and her nursing buddies.

You had me at "delivery stories". And i'm outta here.

Suzanne Casamento said...

Excellent mantra! And scary, scary stories. Yikes!